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Sorority Row Blu-ray offers solid video and great audio, but overall it's a mediocre Blu-ray release
After a wayward prank leaves one of their own dead, a group of sorority sisters try to cover it
up, only to be stalked by a serial killer.
For more about Sorority Row and the Sorority Row Blu-ray release, see Sorority Row Blu-ray Review published by Casey Broadwater on March 15, 2010 where this Blu-ray release scored 2.5 out of 5.
The slasher is perhaps horror's most codified sub-genre. Yes, zombies and werewolves and vampires
all have their mythologies and cinematic rules, but the slasher film is a different beast altogether.
They're usually simple morality tales about reckless youth on the cusp of adulthood, an age rife with
sex and drugs and rebellion. Often, they're staged around holidays or special events. The masked
killer, armed with some kind of iconic weapon, whittles down a group of attractive, unsupervised
youngsters in an isolated location until he gets to The Final Girl, who survives but is somehow
traumatized or trapped by what she's seen and done. Okay, so let's see how Sorority Row
stacks up against its predecessors: It's about a clique of sorority seniors—cusp of adulthood, check—
who cover up the death of one of their own—morality tale, check—get stalked and killed during a
graduation party—special event, check, booze and sex, check, no supervision, check—by a hooded
figure with a tire iron—iconic weapon, check—until our vaguely morally superior heroine—Final Girl,
check—faces off against the killer and makes it through the night. I think my figurative pen just ran
out of ink. With all the boxes checked, you may ask, what is there to differentiate Sorority
Row from the bloody slew of prior slashers? Absolutely nothing. Is it still worth watching? That
all depends on how loosely you define "entertainment."
Toasting to your health doesn't assure anything in a horror film.
If my barebones synopsis sounds vaguely familiar—and not just because all slasher plots are
similar—it's because Sorority Row is a loose remake of 1983 cult semi-classic The
House on Sorority Row. In this new version, five Theta Pi seniors, led by Jessica (Leah Pipes)
—a social aesthete, potential future trophy wife, and stone cold bitch—fake a friend's death by
overdose to freak out her cheating boyfriend, who then stabs the girl in the chest for
reals in one of those unrealistic horror movie moments where a character totally overreacts.
(His rationale was that he needed to puncture her lungs so they could sink her body to the
bottom of the local quarry. At least he's a fast thinker.) Bonded by the Theta Pi motto of "Trust,
Respect, Honor, Secrecy, and Solidarity," the girls unanimously agree to dump the body down a
well and never tell a soul. Well, almost unanimously. Mousy, bespectacled Ellie (Rumer Willis) and
conscientious objector Cassidy (Briana Evigan) would've rather gone to the cops, but they remain
silent to protect their sisters. Early candidates for Final Girl, perhaps? Fast-forward eight months
to graduation day and the final party of the year, the parting bacchanalian blast of their college
careers, and for most of them, the last night of their lives. A hooded figure wearing a graduation
gown is on the prowl, taking down Theta Pi sisters and their meathead boyfriends with a tire iron
tricked out with wicked blades.
Since slasher films adhere so stringently to the formula, the only differentiation is to have a
unique killer, ingeniously brutal kills, or an ante-upping kill count. Sorority Row plays it
much too safe here, and the outcome is horror movie mediocrity. In these kinds of films, the
killer usually rises to the level of an anti-hero—you can't wait to see what he does next, as he's
much more interesting than the disposable teenagers getting axed—but Sorority Row's
shrouded avenger is easily the least threatening, least memorable villain in years, a half-hearted
amalgam of the baddies from Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer
(Sorority Row also stole most of its plot points from the latter.) Worse, the big reveal of
the killer's identity—complete with a ridiculously overdrawn speech about his/her motives—will
likely illicit either rolled eyes, shrugged shoulders, or a loud pssshhhh. The ten or so kills
are all relatively tame and mostly orally fixated—one girl gets a wine bottle shoved down her
throat, another gets shot in the mouth with a flare gun—and the phallic obviousness quickly
grows tiresome and repetitive. As expected from a film called Sorority Row, there are also
a few furtive T&A shots, courtesy of girls jumping on a trampoline wearing pajamas with the
butt-flaps open, and the obligatory gratuitous shower scene.
Few will object, I assume, as the cast includes enough eye candy to give your pupil's cavities. The
quintet of young starlets here is at least, on the whole, more talented than the knife fodder of
most slasher films, but they don't have much to do besides get into catty arguments, pussyfoot
around in the dark, and, well, die. Despite the script's insistence on giving each character a minor
sub-plot—an attempt to obfuscate the simplicity of the story—few of the girls are developed
beyond mere stereotype. The two exceptions would be Leah Pipes' Jessica, an ice queen with
social-ladder-climbing ambitions, and Briana Evigan's Cassidy, who has grown jaded of sorority
life. To contrast, we have Chugs (Margo Harshman), a wanton slut who imbibes lots of alcohol
and, presumably, other fluids. It should be no spoiler to tell you that Chugs doesn't last the night.
Director Stewart Hendler shows some gracefulness with the camerawork during the excellently
staged opening party scene, and the accidental death of the first sorority sis is a genuinely tense
sequence, but the intensity quickly flags once the killer gets down to business. There's little
tension, suspense slogs, and few surprises await—aside from the occasional jump scare—leaving
Sorority Row largely free of the visceral thrills expected from a slasher.
Sorority Row comes to Blu-ray with a 1080p/AVC-encoded transfer that's strong but
inconsistent, sometimes as stunning as Jamie Chung in a towel, and other times looking like a
pledge with a post-hazing hangover. Clarity varies between tack-sharp close-ups—see the beads of
water on Claire's face as she gets out of the shower, and notice the fine details of her skin texture—
to sequences that look somewhat soft and indistinct, like the scene with Cassidy and her boyfriend
lying in bed together. I haven't seen the DVD to make a comparison, but I'm sure the Blu-ray
presents a modest but appreciable upgrade. The party sequence at the beginning of the film shows
off a lot of bright, bold colors, and as the film wears on, the palette is appropriately reigned in until
we have a stark and slightly gritty nighttime image as we tiptoe through the sorority house's
deserted hallways. Black levels are mostly deep without becoming oppressive, and while grain spikes
a bit during the darker moments, it's never distracting, as it's all part of the low-budget horror
aesthetic. Likewise, skin tones jump from ultra-tan to super pasty from scene to scene, but this is
mostly due to stylized lighting choices. With a clean print and no overt technical troubles to nitpick
over, this transfer seems to represent the film well, even if Sorority Row isn't the best-
looking horror title to appear on Blu-ray.
When things go bump in the night at a sorority house, it's usually because one of the girls has
snuck her boyfriend in, but in Sorority Row's DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 surround track,
you're more likely to hear a killer's blade whistling through the air than a headboard smacking
rhythmically against the wall. Audio is an essential part of most horror films, and though
Sorority Row doesn't use sound as intricately as other genre entries, this is still a solid
track, with booming dynamics, a strong sense of detail, and a modest but appreciated use of the
rear channels for ambience and effects. The party scenes come to life with chatter and the deep LFE
pulse of blasted dance music. The killer's tricked-out tire iron spins between channels and plunges
with a sickening squish into a victim's face. The overused but effective jump scares jolt with sudden
musical stabs. And while voices are sometimes hard to make out during the mammoth parties—
realistically—the dialogue is easy to make out the rest of the time. Overall, this track is almost
exactly what you'd expect—loud, jarring, and full-blooded.
PIP Feature Commentary with Director and Cast
Director Stewart Hendler and four of his sorority beauties—Briana Evigan, Leah Pipes, Rumer
Willis, and Margo Harshman—give a video commentary that's extremely, perhaps overly chatty,
which is unsurprising considering the number of participants. The picture-in-picture window is
kind of small, though, so unless you have a 100" screen, you'll have to be sitting pretty close to
really see the actors' expressions.
Sorority Secrets: Stories from the Set (1080p, 10:27)
Briana Evigan, Stewart Hendler, Leah Pipes, Jamie Chung, Rumer Willis, and Margo Harshman
each say a few words about their characters and reminisce about the sheer amount of estrogen
on set.
Killer 101 (1080p, 13:59)
Director Stewart Hendler and screenwriters Josh Stolberg and Pete Goldfinger discuss the
conventions of the horror genre—the final girl, going foolishly into dark places, the killer's motive
speech, etc.—and basically, with the help of some clips from the film, show how Sorority
Girls adheres unfailingly to each of them. At least they know they're being derivative, I
guess. Don't watch this before the film unless you want every reveal spoiled.
Kill Switch (1080p, 10:24)
Don't feel like watching the entirety of a ho-hum horror movie but still want some gruesome,
visceral thrills? Okay, you sicko, here you go. Kill Switch fastforwards through what passes in
Sorority Girls for plot and simply shows each of the film's kills.
Deleted Scenes (1080p, 6:53)
Includes five deleted scenes and a lame alternate ending, all available with optional introductions
by the director.
Outtakes (1080p, 5:27)
Your average assortment of flubbed lines and improvised silliness.
Less discerning genre fans might take to Sorority Row, the latest paint-by-the-numbers
slasher to bloody up Blu-ray, but more demanding horrorphiles will find it endlessly derivative and
lacking in both intensity and innovation. Not every horror film has to raise the bar or change the
rules, but Sorority Row sticks so staunchly to convention that it all but disappears into the
plots, kills, and characters of its predecessors. If you're planning on pledging to this
Sorority, please be responsible and temper your expectations accordingly.
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